Heartcrossings

I am Bengali but the dishes I cook best are from other parts of India. There are only a few Bengali dishes that I can reproduce per specification - most stray too far from standard to be considered authentic. But my sambar and curd rice will meet pretty exacting standards because I learned from the best. Reading this story about the national origin of chefs in Italian restaurants made me wonder if my South Indian dishes will fail the test because I am from a different part of India. I want to believe my effort to learn and execute well should matter more than where I am from. That should be standard any cook should be held to professional or not. Did they truly immerse themselves in the culture and learn how to get it right. Can they tell the difference between the prefect dish and one that is only trying to be.  But there is a question whether those changes, so far subtle, are happening as a conscious effort to be creative, or simply foreign chefs reverting to the flavors they kn...

Every student athlete has a path to becoming an influencer . Possibly a good thing if earnings from being on social media is how that is measured. It takes both a ton of natural talent and perseverance to get to this level so it makes sense there is some form of reward for extraordinary achievement. It would motivate others to excel.  Yet the way the monies are made does not sound particularly appealing. The person needs to turn themselves into a non-stop spectacle to earn and maintain their influencer status. As the field gets crowded and competitive, the demand to perform non-stop will only grow. Getting turned into a product and being fed into a greedy marketing machine that will stop at nothing to sell more does not sound like a great outcome even if there are financial rewards for it Athleta’s chief digital officer, said it was testing ads with the students in part to help “build a bridge to our next generation of consumers,” and to see if the exposure could eventually exceed ...

I was chatting with J recently about the source of information that her generation uses to make important life decisions and how many of them could be dubious and of unverified provenance . Since its an always on culture, the the stream of information is never-ending, there is little opportunity to fact-check. ..although people of all ages are bad at detecting misinformation — which is only getting harder amid the rise of AI — members of Gen Z are particularly vulnerable to being fooled. Why? There’s a dangerous feedback loop at play. Many young people are growing deeply skeptical of institutions and more inclined toward conspiracy theories, which makes them shun mainstream news outlets and immerse themselves in narrow online communities — which then feeds them fabrications based on powerful algorithms and further deepens their distrust. It’s the kind of media consumption that differs drastically from older generations who spend far more time with mainstream media, and the consequences...

I met J for a day while on a work trip. It was a long day for her but a very rewarding time for me. Since she moved, I have seen her a lot less than I did before. This might have been the first time since she left to college that I felt that I got it right as far as being mother to a grown-up kid. I was able to make the subtle changes in my behavior that gave her room to be her own woman while still being my daughter. One does not compete with the other. That took several years to happen. I am sure I will slip up some in the future but this one day set a baseline for both of us in terms of what we'd like our relationship to be.  Later that day when I called my mother she informed me that M, a kid we both know and love (only a few years older than J) was paralyzed from brain stroke and it was not clear how long and how much he would recover. I met him a few year ago and was happy to see him thriving - he had a job he loved and was with a woman we thought was great for him. My sense ...

My favorite lavender perfume is running low and the perfumery no longer makes it. It was classic lavender scent with no frills and it smells of hope and bright beginnings to me. Trying to find it has been an adventure reminiscent of my attempts to locate fragrances I recall from my childhood - perfumes my mother wore, some soaps, shampoos, and talcum powder we used at home also incense sticks. Sometimes I recall the details of the container or wrapper in great detail but the smell itself is harder to recall. I would not be able to describe it well to someone who was not familiar with it.  Some of the smells are connected with the sweltering heat of summer relieved by a long shower and that transient feeling of freshness until it passed. Lavender is a smell from childhood summers - my love for it has not changed or diminished in all this time. I recall a very fashionable owner of a boutique perfume store telling me that lavender is basic and while lovely, its the starter end of good...

On a hike along the coast, I noticed family of four who always seemed to find the best vantage points for pictures. The youngest was a bit bored and kept asking when they could go home. The mother was trying to keep him interested in the outing. Father was the designated photographer with a fancy camera and the oldest, a teenaged girl was happy to pose for pictures. I never had a family of this configuration so what is obviously a mundane experience for them is unique to me.  It made me wonder about the value of travel for kids so young that they can't actually appreciate what they are seeing. This family has two kids one of whom is ready to see the world and the other is not quite there. By the time the youngest comes along, the oldest will be a off to college and out of bounds for the most part. So the parents are doing what is right and logical - trying to make it work for everyone to some extent. This particular trip might end up a blur or even completely forgotten by the son b...

There is something to be said for being able to see a color only five people in the world can . Imagine using a color as as social status signaling mechanism - you see if one way if you are in select group and a different way if you are an outsider. I read this story soon after overhearing a conversation at a coffee shop while waiting for my drink. Two people were discussing the use of specific colors on the customer support chatbot experience - how the use of some colors in conjunction with the rep's response to the customer issue can trigger emotions that transcend the current problem.  One example cited was a the rep says we can't make an exception for you because that wouldn't be fair to the rest of our customers. Apparently that is a highly triggering statement to some folks and can be very neutral to others. I wasn't able to catch how this was exacerbated by color because these folks picked up their coffees and left. I made a mental note to ask some UX designers I...