Heartcrossings

We were out to lunch and one person in our group knew some folks at an other table that also had just the number of open seats we needed. So we joined them and I found myself seated next to a software developer whose just under seven years at his first and only job after college. We got chatting and I learned that he had recently become a homeowner and he was proud to share how expensive the home was and how close it was to his office.  To be able to pay for that house, he had to absolutely keep the job he had. From his description of what he did, he is a commodity full stack developer undistinguishable from the legions of others just like him. He had lucked into a very good gig and thanks to the humungous mortgage was extremely motivated to keep his paycheck. He had made the conscious decision to get into a team in his company where the work was predictable and uncomplicated.  Instead of worrying about being viable as a professional for a very long time, he focused on home bu...

M was a design consultant at the company where I worked a few years ago. He did a good job, got along with everyone and was well-liked. He had three kids all under 6 years old and they way he described the life he and his wife led, it seemed as if they worked as hard as they could to earn enough for child care of their three kids. The numbers were staggering even back then. They always wanted a second kid and ended up having twins and that had life altering consequences for M and his wife. Her job required her to travel for multiple weeks at a time but the pay was too good to pass up but not enough for M to stay at home. He picked contract work to have flexibility (and better money) but it came with a huge dose of uncertainty as well.  The family was together some weekends and they made the most of it. M used to joke the unit of measure was 7 days for him as the days were a daze. He really got to spend some good quality time with his kids once a week. A lot could have changed from...

It was spellbinding to see what the Hubble saw on birthdates of people who I care about. On my own it saw the Andromeda and on J's the Arches cluster. It was ironic that earlier that afternoon I found myself thinking about how J and I are so different that as adults the ties that bind us feel incredibly tenuous sometimes - Arches and Andromeda is so fitting. Maye that is the way it is meant to be between parent and adult child, asking for different is preparing for disappointment. Behind the thick tree-line in my backyard, is the driveway of our neighbors The K's.  Sometimes when I am looking through the kitchen window, I see old Mr. K on his John Deere, his son (now in his thirties) with a leaf blower working in the yard. Sometimes they play pickleball on the driveway, the two sons and the parents. Mrs. K told me once that she has spent years waiting for the time her sons would finally take off. They are both married and had their first kids in the last couple of years but th...

I feel a sense of gratitude when I have the time to be bothered by really minor annoyances. I arrive after a long and somewhat delayed flight at a hotel that is a block away from the office, a place I have stayed many times in the past. The best way to describe this establishment is - goofy. It would not the first choice for anyone's business trip but I took a shine to it. I like their minor quirks and how they can bring a mini fridge to my room if I say I'd like one. How its generally one welcome cookie for the trip but they look the other way if I get a couple of extra. The cookies are amazing and they don't look the part. A more discerning customer may completely avoid a cookie that looks so tacky but that is their overall vibe. Being here makes me feel at home and at ease. I can't imagine what better purpose a hotel can serve on a business trip. As usual my freshly applied nail polish was chipped all over from moving luggage up and down so I had to take some time to...

 In this Guardian article technofossil is a one word, but it feels like in need of two. There is a very high level of arrogance combined with uncertainty around technology these days. Once day all humans are going to displaced by AI and robots, the next day a contrary opinion about the AI will get dumb to the point of self-destruction because the average intelligence it depends on is getting lowered by the day. Between these wide swings, people in technology are getting by day to day.  Some are much more concerned than others but such is always the case not matter what the issue at hand. But at no point is there talk of fossils we will create and perpetuate and how chicken bones and plastic grocery bags are not hitting the high notes for the persistent markers of a civilization. It may be quite fitting though that our collective hubris about so-called achievements dies a forgotten death and the all that remains are relics of our reckless and mindless consumer culture Computer ...

Once a year in spring I clean up the thick carpet of pine needles under the line of pine trees in my yard. They suffocate the earth until nothing but the most tenacious weeds can grow there. Cleaning the pine needles is hard work and at the end of many hours there is nothing much to see other than the ground being visible once again. I walk away tired and somewhat satisfied and the pine cones continue to fall, the trees have mostly greened by now.  This annual ritual reminds of the changes that this part of my yard has gone through over the years and how each phase of its existence was deeply entwined with my own life's ebb and tide. J's middle school years left me with absolutely no discretionary time. There was a guy who cut the grass to keep the place from turning completely wild. Every once in a great while I would trim some bushes. The line of pine trees had been overcome by some invasive brush that grew furiously all around the trees, giving them no room to breathe. High ...

Stealing time is one thing but money a bit different but there could be a logic to say that they are one and the same. What is interesting about the stories is that all the thievery is going on in the office not away working from home though showing up at noon could go one way or the other. While its easy and tempting to blame a whole generation as lazy, the real problem lies elsewhere.  There are no competent or inspiring people managers or leaders of any sort that these young folks work for. So no surprise they feel no desire to perform at work. If a person was able to read 74 ebooks a year pretending they were reading their email, that person should not have been hired to begin because they have no measurable job to do. Every account in the article points to the same problem - one of over-hiring and not having a well-defined job where performance can be tangibly measured. That and no sense of team, shared vision, common purpose and the like. These folks are sleep-walking throug...