My closet has been in the need of more than a touch of new for a while. This weekend, I finally went out shopping hoping to remedy the situation in one fell swoop. Several hours later, I had not been able to make a single purchase. This has increasingly been the pattern of my "shopping sprees" that happen quite rarely to begin with. Unless I'm willing to pay an arm and leg, it seems impossible to find something that fits me well and also becomes my age.
Fashionable clothes are easy to shop for but finding one's distinctive style is a whole different matter. Some of my girlfriends swear by thrift stores in upscale neighborhoods - they have given up on the offerings of the suburban mall. I have a cultural block about wearing hand-me-downs - so its not an option for me.
All of this makes me miss my tailor back in India who could create perfection from my rough pencil sketches accompanied by a flurry of inarticulate requirements. Reading Margaret Bender's account of her tailor, Mr Singh only accentuates my longing for mine - I could have been wearing a classic Chanel outfit recreated in Luncknow Chikan on chiffon this summer.
An expat desi friend and I were discussing what it means to return to India when you have cobbled together a life in a foreign country no matter how flawed and imperfect. We have both spent over a decade outside India and have kids who were born abroad and have spent very little time back home. Returning "home" is something a lot of new immigrants like L and myself think about. We want very much for that to be an option because a full assimilation into our country of domicile is likely never going to happen. L has visited India more often than I have and has a much better pulse on what's going on there. For me the strongest drag force working against my desire to return home is my experience of life as a woman in India. I neither want to live that suffocatingly sheltered existence myself nor subject J to it. The freedom, independence and safety I have had in here in suburban America was not even something I knew I could expect to have in India. I never knew what it felt t...
Comments