Sunday, February 14, 2010

Fun Challenged

My co-worker S was lamenting her inability to come up with cute, creative and fun ideas to entertain her four year old with. Her ineptitude became particularly evident over the last couple of weeks when we were all snowed in. Whereas every other mom she knows did "fun" stuff with their kids and created wonderful childhood memories while they were at it, S struggled to think of something fun do with little Jason.

Being that misery loves company, I told S I was similarly challenged. We both agreed that we were failing to make the grade as mothers and should try and get with the program. Clearly, that is easier said than done. This is about temperament and ability - you either have it or don't. I asked her if she thought our kids were unhappy because of the way we are as compared to the kids of "fun mothers". S was not sure that was the case but there was still the nagging sense of guilt.

The conversation with S lingered on in my mind even after I came home. I asked J if she wished her mom was more fun like many other moms we both know. J said "I like you just the way you are". Even though I don't do a lot of fun stuff with you, I asked. "I don't care. If I needed to do anything fun, I could do it all by myself. I don't need any help" J replied nonchalantly. Apparently, she had worked around my general lack of ability in the fun and entertainment area. What's more she had become more self-sufficient as a result. It is not often that our omissions and inabilities as parents have such fortuitous results.

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