One Year Since

One year ago on this day, I first got to know H. Two months later, alternating between euphoria and despair the relationship came to an end. He moved on so dispassionately that I wondered if everything we had between us was a grand illusion fed solely by my imagination. H turned me into a teenager giddily in love - reviving feelings in me that had been dead for many years. Like a mind-altering drug he could make me forget the struggle and uncertainties my life was fraught with.

I still remember his laughter, the way we talked to the wee hours of the morning every night like we could never tire of pouring ourselves out on the other. Yet in his wake he left me disillusioned with the notion of romantic love, corroded my ability to trust men completely. Even a year later, new relationships bring on deja vu - maybe I am not over H yet.