Time Travel With Smell

On our last day together in Kolkata, my friend S gave me a bottle of hand lotion. I was looking for mine and having no luck finding it, we were running late and S came to the rescue. Decades ago in college, she had rescued me from things - most importantly from the overwhelming sense of being in the wrong place and having no direction. The long hours in the dorm and cafeteria spent in aimless conversations brought a great deal of clarity for me. Yet, I lacked to wisdom to act on what I had learned about myself. It is said, all those who wander are not lost - I was certainly both. The heady smell of rose in the lotion acts as a trigger whenever I use it. It forces me to think deliberately instead of seeking excuses. 

We can choose to live an expressive life, that touches and benefits many. Or we could just exist for our responsibilities without risk, without such a degree of closeness that can cause discomfort or pain. S and I have lived almost as if in reverse of each other. Professionally, S is like a scuba-diver who needed to see the ocean-floor so badly that they could not wait to either be trained or be outfitted in the right gear. She just dove head first and there was never any turning back. She values things very differently than most people, but her accomplishments are amazing and uniquely her own. In personal life, S has played it extraordinarily safe.  My professional life exactly replicates S's personal life with very analogous results. When we met all these years later, we were both sad and disappointed to think about what the other may have been.