A dear friend who has more than a fair share of experience with grief, shared this TED Talk with me. The theme is about moving forward not moving on with grief. Very insightful for those of us who have been fortunate (thus far) not have experienced what Nora NcInerny has but know people in our lives who have. It helps us better understand those whom we love and yet often feel challenged to support emotionally.
Listening to her made me think about events in our lives that trigger intense and protracted periods of stress - much like grief does. They fundamentally alter who we are. There is never a full recovery or reset to the prior state. It takes a while for you to get comfortable with what you have become. Friends and family often struggle to relate to this altered persona that they neither knew nor loved. When guilt meets obligation for them to continue to remain in your life, everything begins to crumble. Only similarly broken and misshapen people can come close to understanding you as you now are, no matter what you once were.
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