In the Middle

My immediate family lives in three continents and lately my day begins with responding to messages from my father who is worried for our well-being though pushing eighty, though he is probably among most vulnerable in this pandemic. But he feels just as invincible in his mind as he did when I was a child. Facts and scientific evidence matter little to him. But he presumes the rest of us will not do enough to take care of ourselves unless he harangues us daily. My commonsense advice to him to take care of himself falls on deaf ears. He is still bigger and stronger than us all. It does not help that he has taken to social media only recently and treats everything seen on the internet as the gospel. 

Yet his anxieties do percolate down. So right after I speak with him and finish assuring him there is nothing to worry about, I make sure I check in with J, repeat my instructions on how she can best take care of herself. Stuck in the middle, I try to pacify my father on one had and try to shake J out of youthful complacency on the other. To both sides, I need to project a sense of calm as if I know with great certainty nothing will happen to anyone. Such are the joys of being in the middle - neither side knows exactly how information I am trying to gather on this topic all day and how often I am truly scared.