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 The pandemic gave me a few months more with J after she had already moved out to college. It was unexpected bounty and I tried to make the most of it without smothering her. Easier said than done as I was to find out. I regressed several times into the babying mode knowing full well that I am dealing with an adult. In response, J slid into a mode that mirrored my attitude towards her. We had progress in fits and starts as I tried to adjust to the new reality of my life - I am the mother of an adult child very close to becoming fully independent. The day I dropped her off at the airport was a hard one. We were excited for her to return to college and unless things went awry, I knew I would not see her for a while. 

Being home for an indeterminate period of time was an experience she did not enjoy - it took away from the freedom that she had only recently earned. After she left, I had time to reflect about the unexpected and rather long visit, perhaps the only one that would happen in a long time. Kids are forging alternate routes to avoid being back home again for lack of options. This experience has proven to a test for their appetite to yield to parental control in lieu of conveniences. For many the control is unbearable and must be overcome. While that may not be the case with J, she definitely has a much stronger yen for freedom now than she did when she returned home earlier this year.

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