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Pain and Love

I know a couple of people who suffer from chronic pain. Back when it started, family and friends had an abundance of concern and compassion but over the decades that wore out to nothing. One of them is my aunt S. Her world grew smaller as the years passed until she is confined to her bedroom now. 

If anyone ever doubted how deeply my uncle loves her, they just need to see that he is the only person left in the world that feels her pain alongside her every day. It did not grow old and routine for him, did not morph into a source of annoyance. He knows where she hurts and how, what makes her comfortable and what does not. While the rest of the world has moved on from S, he has not - he is easing her troubles every day. Reading this essay about losing the ability to walk when already constrained by chronic pain reminded me of my aunt. This description about the onset of sudden and inexplicable pain is very sad to read

First off, the pain bears no relation to how you feel when you’re doing a thing. Swimming might feel great – so floaty, what could go wrong – but watch out for kryptonite later in the week. Detached from its immediate cause, pain is perplexing – like being on the receiving end of an irrational outburst of anger from someone you love.

In my aunt's life the pain may be irrational but she is lucky to have real love. 

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