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Broken Parts

MeFi has always been a fun place for me to go for accidental wit and wisdom. This one for instance about people in their 50s trying to be in a relationship is spot on: 

Pretty much everyone is broken by the time they’re in their fifties - physically and mentally. Everyone has some sort of family problem that they have to deal with from time to time. The key is to be aware that you’re broken, and find someone whose broken parts work well with your broken parts.

This is true even for much younger people. I would argue as young as 25. At that point things are not broken to the point they cannot be mended, but there are tendencies that are pretty well entrenched. There are those who are blessed with a sense of adventure and want to go see the world, there are those who want to be comfortable and mostly stay local. There are those who aspire for a great career and prioritize that over other things, those that want to start a family and work only as much as is needed. 

These tendencies remain static until there is a major life-altering event - but a prospective partner should not count on it. What you see is what you get for the most part. If what you see appears somewhat "broken" it is best not to come in with a chest of tools in hopes of fixing it. The only difference is that in our youth we believe change is possible - in us and in the other, as we grow older we come to realize that it is not. So making sure the broken parts and mutually compatible is key to success 50s or 20s. 

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