At a holiday party at our neighbor's a few weeks ago, I met a woman I have not seen before. I noticed her bright smile and exuberant copper jewelry. At some point she was seated next to me and we started to chat. L is a recently retired nurse. She said waking up in the mornings makes her feel like a stay-at-home mom without any kids to raise. This is the first time in her adult life she finds herself at home without anyone to care for. Opportunities to volunteer have come about but the idea of committing to set days and hours is not appealing to her - that is the life she has left behind. At some later point in our conversation I learned she had two children of whom one had died a few years ago.
Even before I could process the information L said that she sees her deceased child her dreams all the time and so vividly that does not experience the loss - she knows her daughter is in heaven and is there are signs for her to see wherever she looks - in nature, in waking and sleeping moments wherever she might be. C is a constant presence and a cheerful one as she had been in life. To say I was amazed by L would be to understate it. Faith is truly tested in adversity and hers is the highest form of adversity a person can experience in their life. I had no words to adequately express my feelings - telling L that I sorry for her loss would be absurd. C was far from lost to L - she was indeed more present than she had been in life, a validation of her faith. We went back to more mundane topics, other folks joined the conversation in the meantime. I came away grateful for me meeting with L and it gave me a lot to think about.
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