It took several days to unpack what the trip to Kolkata had been about. I had two goals - one to help my parents complete long-standing tasks that required my physical presence and two to make this trip one that they would remember fondly if this turned out be the last time I saw one of them alive. The second goal set the tone for my visit. Time and again, I tried to imagine what it might be to be in their shoes where every day that they live independently, do the things they enjoy, stay on in the home they have made together is gift. Their universe has shrunk to a the narrow confines of their apartment, the people who in the community and their daily living rituals.
It took me a lot of time and effort to realize that asking that they expand their horizons is not realistic. I can bring the world to them, try and show what is out there and within their reach but that does not mean they will do anything about it. This I need to accept and leave in peace. I immersed myself in their environment for a couple of weeks, understood the ebb and tide of their daily lives and discovered some small changes that could improve the quality of their lives. Before leaving Kolkata, I made a list of actions for them to take and it is heart-warming to see that they have started working through my list and are reporting favorable results. I don't think I have the right to ask for more.
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