J probably does not remember this anymore. Such is the fickleness of a young person's memory but not their parent's. She had a blanket and a specific corner of a couch she liked to curl up in. Sometimes, I would find her there even on a warm day when a blanket seemed a touch excessive. If I asked her about it she would say "Its a cold world, I need a blanket". It was said in jest but there may have been a tinge of truth to that as well. Those were the hardest years of her young life and it is plausible that the world felt cold to her given how narrow their confines were for her at the time. This was before the first stage of freedom that gave with a driver's license and then the ownership of a car. The blanket remained her steadfast companion until she left to college but her relationship with it evolved with time.
Looking back, I wonder if the world had started to feel more warm, as she stepped into it more often and on her own. J's blanket is one of many that sit in my linen closet and I use it sometimes. When I find myself reaching for it on a warm day, I wonder if I like J back then sense a cold world and need a blanket. I try to remember her smile as she said her little catch-phrase. When she visited for a couple of days recently, she never sought out the said blanket. She's a young woman starting out in life - her world is filled with ups and downs, dreams and frustrations that in balance likely keep her more warm than cold. These thoughts crossed my mind when my friend L talked about how she could sweat in a cold pool because she's menopausal. L has interesting coping strategies to deal with a cold world. Each time someone upsets her she holds a plank for a minute.
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