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Survivor's Guilt

One of my former co-workers wrote today about survivor's guilt having by now survived two rounds of layoffs - the latest round hit close to home where peers he respected were laid off for reasons that were not obvious to any of those left behind. Many among us can relate to that guilt he speaks of. One of my friends posted about the moment she found out. She was away from home meeting with a client. They were in the middle a proposal review she was leading with a dozen folks from the client team in attendance. Someone from the company team pulled her aside and told her to check her personal email. L is a true professional but this is beyond anything she had faced in her long career. She was in complete shock at how it was handled and what it meant to be professional under the circumstances. At that moment she was persona non-grata at the meeting and her proposal meant nothing to anyone anymore. 

She was free to leave with her personal belongings, use the rest of the day as she pleased. She was supposed to return home the following day but chose to check out the hotel and rebook her flight. The sense of stupefaction was overwhelming. I want to reach out to L and tell her that she acted with as much grace as anyone in her situation could muster but it is very hard. But I don't have a right to say much (if anything) until I have actually been in her shoes. Until then my words don't matter. I wish I knew people who are currently looking for someone with L's background - she is awesome. But I don't so empty offers of help don't count either. This feels like the only place I can express how it feels. I might be the next one to go through what L did and should that come to pass, I hope I can show as much grace under pressure as she did. 

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