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Wanting More

For several months now, I have been working slowly with my parents and J to organize a vacation from the three of them in India but away from Kolkata. The idea was that it would be a change of scenery for parents while J could see a part of India she has never been to. Making this happen turned out to be a very slow and iterative process with many fits and starts. While everyone involved is well-intentioned, age and cultural differences makes bringing them together complicated. Plans are made and unmade all the time. This is very far from a conflict and yet the process has proved stressful for all involved. 

My friends who have elderly parents have counseled me that I would be better off not trying to dislodge my parents from the comfort of their home - have J visit them where they live. There is some sense to that but I find that I am struggling to give up on my vision of a vacation for the three of them in a place new to them all. The hope is to create new memories where everyone starts exactly at the same point - a very hard thing to do when there is such a big age and experience gap between the people involved. 

I am imaging that this vacation they take together will re-calibrate their relationship - it will become one between adults who love and respect each other, that conversations will be had between J and my parents that have not been had before. We are quite close to making this all come true but I will be a bit on edge until I my dreams actually come true. 

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