Birth Trauma

I recall my mother telling me when I was about twelve, that she had decided she would never have another child because giving birth to me had been so physically demanding for her. The way she said it did not ascribe any blame to me for her troubles but it helped clarify what motherhood can or cannot be for her. I know for a fact that my father always wanted a second child so I was not sure if she had ever shared her perspective on the topic with him. It appeared that she had not because she did not want to come across as "deficient" or somehow lacking the requisite level of maternal desire. So this was in essence a confession to me. 

This article highlights how birth trauma is a widespread but often unspoken issue among South Asian (Desi) women, affecting as many as one in four women globally. Despite its prevalence, birth trauma remains largely unrecognized and unaddressed within Desi communities due to cultural norms that encourage women to endure pain and hardship in silence. Expressing vulnerability or seeking help for mental health struggles is frequently stigmatized, leaving many women to suffer without support. Reading it, brought that long ago conversation with my mother to mind. She was most likely a victim of undiagnosed and therefore untreated birth trauma.

Cultural expectations and generational attitudes play a significant role in perpetuating this silence. Many South Asian women are taught to simply "get on with it" after childbirth, with little emphasis on emotional or psychological recovery. Historical lack of antenatal and postpartum care, combined with language barriers and mistrust in healthcare systems, further isolate women, making it difficult for them to access the help they need. Additionally, restrictive traditions and superstitions can heighten anxiety and feelings of isolation for expectant and new mothers.