Writing Apology

Interesting essay on what goes through an inmate's mind when they write an apology letter to the victim or their family.

..guidelines for how a prisoner should approach writing an apology letter — that expecting forgiveness, for instance, is self-serving, and means you probably aren’t ready to write the letter. Reading this, I wondered: Was it selfish to hope for forgiveness?

The writer speaks of a fellow inmate who has published a book on how inmates can spend time positively in the American prison system

He writes about the apology letter bank in the book, describing two types of guilt: fixated (shame-based) and constructive.

Even in the lives of ordinary people, there comes a time to offer a heartfelt apology. The challenges the author describes probably transcend the specific dilemma he writes about. An apology that is aimed at seeking forgiveness does not bring the recipient any comfort. They feel injured yet another time. Yet never receiving one leaves them feeling resentful. The more time that passes, the harder it gets to do the right thing and the wall between the giver and receiver of apology becomes impenetrable.  This essay gives much food for thought.