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Hard Reset

In the plane I was seated next to a woman who works at the same company I do. I could tell because she was working but as I was not, she had no reason to know. In another time, I would have introduced myself, tried to learn what she does and so on. I found myself completely uninterested in doing any of those things - things that came to me naturally and without a second thought. The woman was wearing an N95 mask for the duration of the flight. I presumed it was not her intent to have conversations with random people who happened to be seated next to her. Beyond that, I believe I might have changed in some fundamental way coming out the other side of the pandemic. Maybe, it served as a time for a hard reset for people to return to their natural settings. 

For me, being naturally introverted, it has always taken effort to socialize. While I can do it and after a while even enjoy it, there is a cold-start problem now having fallen out of practice for a significant length of time. Once I arrived at my destination and checked into the hotel, I went out to grab a quick dinner. Around me, I saw people headed back from work, chatting in small groups before parting ways. I could hear snatches of their conversation from where I was waiting to pick up my kimchi fried rice. This was not the talk I would want to be part of today. One group was talking about a conversation they had had with their boss and what that meant for a call they were going to have with a client the following day. In another life, that could have been me saying the things these folks were saying. But today, it felt completely pointless and unrelatable.

If I had left from work with this set, I would have walked on home without pausing for a social break. That was me in the plane too - I simply could not find it in me to have a casual conversation with this person with whom I likely share a lot of common work experiences - that was the last thing I wanted. It was great to have the space and quiet for a few hours.

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